I think it is safe to say, that I am driven by music. In fact, when I was younger, I sang so much that my older brother would ask my mom if she could get me to shut up because of how much I sang. Even now, in my 40's, I sing all the time, music is just in me. As much as I love to sing however, I got to the point that I hated to perform. I would get knots in my stomach just thinking about singing in front of others, and not due to stage fright. I have sung in front of people since I was little. My first solo in church was before I was a teenager and it was "Love Lifted Me". I participated in Oklahoma Kids, a talent competition and made it to the 4th round. I led our church's praise and worship, and traveled with our pastor all over the state of Oklahoma when he would preach and led the music on those trips. I even went out to California and sang "He Is" at a Women United In Ministry conference. So, what happened that made me get to the point of not wanting to sing in front of others? It began to feel as if people were more impressed with my voice and my talent than focusing on Jesus. I became self conscious and honestly became fearful of how God felt about it. I stopped leading worship all together after a conversation with a member of the church that bothered me to my core. There was a Christian version of American Idol that year, and there were auditions being held in Oklahoma City. He told me that I should go and try out for it. I had just recently given birth to my youngest child, so I had 4 young boys at home, and loved being a stay at home mom, but I had never had a desire to pursue a career in singing. It was a personal love, not one I wanted to make money off of. When I told him that I had no interest in doing that, he began to condemn me and told me that I was "wasting the talent that God had given me" and that I should be chasing becoming a Christian recording artist. It was like a slap in the face that he seemed more worried about what HE felt I should be doing with my voice instead of God. I let it kill the desire to sing in front of people within me, I hardened my heart about it and decided that my voice was going to be only for God. How many years have I let pass that I have denied God's people a blessing He could have given them through me? It wasn't until I started this blog journey of "He Is" that I felt that fire, small at first, but now raging, to want to sing forth the praises of God in front of His people once more. I am replacing my keyboard, and letting His song shine in my heart once again.
The book of Psalms is such a powerful book of praise and I offer you a challenge. Take the time to read the entire book. Don't just skim through it, really read it, and see how many verses that you have sung in different praise and worship songs, both modern and contemporary, as well as our beautiful, timeless hymns. As I was reading some of them last night, I would start singing a praise song that had been birthed from those verses. They are power packed songs, poems and prose declaring how great God is, reaching out in faith for redemption and help in time of trouble, and even prophetically telling of the crucifixion of Jesus. David declared in Psalm 5:3 My voice shalt thou hear in the morning, O Lord; in the morning will I direct my prayer unto thee, and will look up. God was without a doubt David's morning song, and it shows through this entire book that the song of God's praise lived in David's heart. I have started to make it my morning practice, that before I even open my eyes, when I first wake up, that my heart will cry out to God in thanksgiving and praise. I have made a conscious decision that He is my morning song and that before I do anything else, (even have my coffee, which if you're like me is very important) I am going to put God first in my day. When I do that, he will make my path straight. O God, my heart is fixed: I will sing and give praise, even with my glory. 2 Awake, psaltery and harp: I myself will wake early. 3 I will praise thee, O lord among the people; and I will sing praises unto thee among the nations. Psalm 108: 1-3
We find in Psalm 22:3, that God is holy and inhabits the praises of his people. The Hebraic meaning of inhabit is to settle, sit, live, dwell, or occupy as a place of residence. He will come and sit down in your praise and dwell with you. What better way to start your day than to have the Lord come and sit down with you before you ever step a foot outside of bed. He wants to be involved in every part of our day, and that happens when we let Him be our Morning Song.
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